thoughts...

So this post is going to be one of the posts that make me not want Kevin reading my blog... we really don't fight often and things between us are usually very good. Even now I don't think there's anything going on or wrong with our relationship. Seriously, we've never been closer or stronger then we've gotten over the last year or so. And yet... earlier this week Kevin came to me & told me his exgirlfriend, we'll call her T, found him and contacted him on Facebook. Kevin & T broke up 12 years ago (yes, 12 YEARS ago!!) & it didn't end well.. so they haven't spoken or anything pretty much since a short time after they broke up. This was his first real girlfriend that he really loved.. They even lived together for a little bit.. So anyway, she added him on facebook. He told me about it before he accepted her as a friend (or that's what he's told me..& I have nothing to say otherwise) and they started to communicate through Facebook messages. They kind of start catching up a bit & coincidentally she works in Bridgewater.. the next town over from where we live & the same town Kevin works in... she's got a BF of 2.5 years that she bought a house with somewhere. He tells her he's sorry for the way things ended & that he felt badly about the way he treated her. Let me just say that the Kevin of 12 years is a far cry from my wonderful hubby. Had he been the man I met and fell in love with I wouldn't have done any of it and things would be a lot different. I was ok with the emailing.. fine. Why should I really say anything? Email doesn't matter to me as long as it's friend and I know he felt bad so I can justify it.

SO... today he asks me if it bothers me that he & T are talking again. I told him the truth...or maybe 1/2 truth- it does not bother me that they talk, however if he plans on meeting up with her there will be serious shit to follow. Of course now I'm wondering if this has been something they've talked about or suggested and he says no, but I don't' know if I believe him. He said he has thought of it but now "forget it" & I feel like he tried to use like reverse psychology to get me to say it'd be ok. I didn't because to me it wouldn't be ok. He wrote me an email with an apology & he said he'd email T & tell her "goodbye" tonight after he gets home from work.. that he doesn't want to hurt me... blah.. blah.. blah.. I told him it's fine to chat... I just reiterated that meeting was not allowed. (I'm sure I said a bit more and this is the abridged version lol)

I signed out of chat.. oh yeah, did I mention this all happened through yahoo im while I was at work?? and that's where we are now. He went to work, and actually just called me 2 minutes ago to tell me he's coming home. Besides that call we haven't spoken or txt all night long, which is very unusual for us.

Is it me, or do women not usually just pop up for no reason after 12 years? He doesn't understand why I feel so not good about her being back. I haven't read all the emails between them but I honestly wish I could just so I could see what's being said!! OK, so I'm nosy :P Leave me alone! :P Anyway I should go b/c he'll be home in a few & I don't want to be blogging when he walks in. If you made it through this first vent-o-mine, thank you! :) It's good to get things out there.

OH & Let me just toss out there how extremely proud I am that Barack Obama won the race for president!!!! I wish him the best of luck & hope that he's going to be as wonderful a president as he seems he is going to be!!!

TTYL